RELATIONSHIPS
How To Identify And Push Back Against Negging
By AMANDA CHATEL
Simply put, negging a woman is giving her a backhanded compliment to take her confidence down so she'll be more attracted to the person insulting her. It seems absurd, but the theory is from a 1965 study, in which women who had their self-esteem lowered while flirting were more interested in the men who were kicking their confidence to the curb.
Negging isn't just emotional manipulation, but straight-up emotional abuse, and it might take a few rounds before you realize something isn't right. As an example, you may be out to dinner and your date might say, "You look great tonight! I wouldn't think you could pull that look off, but you manage to do it."
Licensed therapist Nick Bognar says, "Negging is a great way to signal to people that you're insecure and a terrible person to be in a relationship with." Even if your date is unaware of the term "negging," an insult is an insult and if someone is blatantly hurting you, you should tell them, but if you're not a fan of confrontation, immediately remove yourself from the situation.