Red Flags In Tarek And Heather Rae El Moussa's Marriage From Our Relationship Experts

Ever since going Instagram official in August 2019, HGTV staple Tarek El Moussa and "Selling Sunset" star Heather Rae El Moussa have been showing off their romance every chance they get. Of course, we know better than to believe that everything is just like it seems on social media — and in the heavily edited world of reality television — which is why we reached out to two relationship experts: celebrity love coach and body language expert Nicole Moore and matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking Susan Trombetti.

After chatting with our experts, it's clear that Tarek and Heather's marriage isn't all sunshine and rainbows as their social media portrays it to be. From potentially not learning the right lessons from past relationships to not fully moving on from those same flames, let's just say that some cracks are showing, and we're not exactly betting on this love story going the distance.

According to our experts, one of the biggest red flags in Tarek and Heather Rae El Moussa's marriage is his history of anger. Those who have been keeping up with Tarek and his ex-wife, fellow TV star Christina Hall, know that their marriage ended with an altercation during which Hall called 911. "Tarek and his ex-wife famously got into fights on the set of their show, and there was an incident involving a gun that led to their divorce," Nicole Moore explains exclusively to Glam, referring to an incident in which Tarek was caught with a pistol in Chino Hills State Park, California. In his book "Flip Your Life: How to Find Opportunity in Distress—in Real Estate, Business, and Life," Tarek explains that he ran to the park after a heated argument with Hall.

"Given that Tarek met Heather only after a year of being divorced from his ex-wife, it's possible that he did not fully heal some of the issues that were a problem in his first marriage before starting a new relationship with Heather," Moore adds. Susan Trombetti agrees. "He has the potential to be violent which is scary," she tells us. "He had downplayed this a bit, and we can understand that, but it did spell the end of their marriage. Guns and marital disagreements shouldn't go hand-in-hand."

In 2021, Heather Rae El Moussa revealed that she got the words "Yes sir, Mr. El Moussa" tattooed on her backside, and when asked to explain, the "Selling Sunset" star told E! News, "I did it as something special for my fiancé, my future husband. I will be Mrs. El Moussa, so this is my name. And it is a special thing that we do around the house: Daddy is the boss, I'm the queen of the house." 

Once Heather shared an image of her tattoo on Instagram, the post was flooded with negative comments, and the reality star ended up deleting the snapshot. "It was completely taken out of context, and the whole meaning of it was blown way out of proportion," she told Us Weekly at the time. While Heather explained that the tattoo was meant as something special for Tarek, our experts point out that this type of mindset showcases a potential power imbalance between the two partners, indicating that Heather is very submissive in their relationship.

"While Heather claimed the tattoo was a cute inside joke, the words do indicate a subservient energy and could point to the fact that Heather sees herself as below her husband in some way," Nicole Moore tells Glam exclusively. "If Heather feels she has to answer to Tarek in the relationship or that his say matters more than hers, that's a huge red flag." Susan Trombetti is on the same page, telling us, "Heather Rae is very submissive to Tarek. ... Even though it was a joke, it tells a lot about their relationship." Of course, there are big signs you're dealing with power struggles in your relationships, as well as aways to cope, and hopefully, Tarek and Heather are working on theirs.

Tarek and Heather Rae El Moussa's relationship moved very quickly, and the two ended up living together not even a week after they began dating. "I came home with Heather Rae Young after 4 days of dating, she moved in, and we never looked back," Tarek captioned, in part, a January 2021 Instagram post. While it can be hard to know when you're ready to move in with your partner, it's safe to say that four days is far too soon.

"Heather Rae Young moved in after 4 days, according to Tarek. It doesn't take a matchmaker to tell you that's too quick; anyone can spot that from a mile away," Susan Trombetti tells us exclusively. "He appears to be looking for someone to throw him a life ring." Trombetti's quick to note, too, that what we see on the outside might not reflect reality: "Although it's been working, we don't know what goes on behind closed doors, and I don't see this as forever," Trombetti explains, adding that Tarek "needed to process the mess his life became" before committing to a new partner.

Anyone who's been following Heather Rae on social media prior to her relationship with Tarek El Moussa has certainly noticed a change in the reality star's content. "While Heather was thriving on 'Selling Sunset' before meeting Tarek, and she often shared scenes of her fabulous life on social media, her content made a drastic shift almost immediately upon starting to date him," Nicole Moore points out exclusively to Glam. "Over time, Heather's persona and content have become somewhat enmeshed with Tarek to the point where it seems as if her main personality trait is now being his wife."

Heather is definitely showing off her partner on social media, which, according to our expert, isn't always a sign of a great relationship. "While it's great to be proud of your partnership, it's a red flag when one partner makes the bulk of their persona about being in the partnership," Moore explains. Finding the right balance between adoring your partner and still leaving enough space for yourself is crucial, even on social media. 

Once Tarek El Moussa began dating Heather Rae Young, it was hard not to notice just how similar the "Selling Sunset" star looked to Tarek's ex-wife, Christina Hall. The blond hair, the love for fashion, and even the way they carry themselves — plenty of similarities could be drawn between the two reality stars. And while many may not think too much of this, our expert explains that this could be a major red flag.

"Tarek has a type. Lots of people do, but this is just something you gravitate towards because you feel familiar either with a look or behaviors that draw you in," Susan Trombetti explains exclusively to Glam. "It's a bad thing because you can end up dating the same person with a different name repeatedly. Christina and Heather Rae look so much alike; it's like he is trying to replace her or continue the relationship with his first wife." Yikes!

The competition reality television show "The Flip Off" starring Christina Hall, Tarek El Moussa, and Heather Rae El Moussa is set to premiere on HGTV in 2025. And while we're no experts, even we know that working with your ex doesn't really seem like a dream come true, and it can put pressure on your new partner. "Working with an ex can't be great," Susan Trombetti tells us exclusively, adding that "[i]t would be nice if they could make a clean break. That would give his relationship with Heather a fighting chance."

Nicole Moore agrees. "It's unclear how much the decision to work with Christina was Tarek's and how much was Heather's, but it's likely that the idea of working so closely with her husband's ex-wife might have caused some upset in Heather," she explains. "Working with an ex-spouse can trigger the problems that caused the relationship to end in the first place, so it's possible that Heather may get caught in the crossfire." Apart from the fact that seeing your partner's ex regularly isn't something most people would choose, Moore also shares that it could be Heather's submissiveness that put her in that situation: "Heather may be so obsessed with her relationship and keeping Tarek happy that she may say yes to things she doesn't actually want to do just to keep the peace."

If you care about more celebrity romances that could fall apart, check out all the red flags in Lana Del Rey's relationship with Jeremy Dufrene.