15 Signs You And Your Partner's Sexual Compatibility Is Strong
Have you been questioning how sexually compatible you are with your partner in comparison to other couples? It's easy enough to gauge your sexual compatibility based on the way you and your partner react and respond to each other's behaviors and actions. Don't feel badly about how things are going with your partner because your best friend brags about having sex multiple times a day with her partner — and that might not be happening for you at the moment.
It shouldn't make you feel insecure if someone always opens up about fetishes (or even vigor) in their sexual relationship while you and your partner maintain the same routine. Your sexual compatibility with your partner is an individualized situation that no one else will ever be able to understand ... unless they become a fly on the wall in your bedroom! Here are a few surefire signs that prove just how solid your sexual compatibility with your partner is.
You tend to be aroused at the same times
Having a matching sex drive with your partner is a great sign the two of you are sexually compatible. It could be frustrating dealing with a partner who's ready to get it on early in the morning when you're still half asleep. You might not want to be bothered during those early morning hours before you've used the bathroom or brushed your teeth. Your partner, on the other hand, might feel riskier than ever as they're rolling out of bed.
If you and your partner are on the same page about waiting until you've both made yourselves "presentable" before getting into things, then you're definitely sexually compatible. The same rules apply when it comes to getting intimate at any other time of day. There might be a few things you care to handle before stripping down and baring all, including freshening up in the shower or eating dinner so you're not distracted by your rumbling belly. Having a partner who understands where your mindset lies before prodding you to get sexual is a wonderful thing.
You share the same bedroom kinks in common
Millions of people admit to having a kink or two in the bedroom. It's possible you don't have any kinks at all, and that's also perfectly normal. If you do happen to have a special kink that gets you in the mood, you already know how much more enjoyable sex can be with a partner who respects all the things that turn you on. Some common kinks people get into include spanking, hair pulling, and other modes of BDSM that take things even farther.
Another popular kink revolves around role playing. When you role play, you and your partner pretend to be different people to get yourselves all riled up. Another kink would be using various sex toys in the bedroom including vibrators, dildos, and plugs. You and your partner might also be into dirty talk, which is when you each say specific things to each other in the moment to create more heat and excitement. Regardless of what you thoroughly enjoy, you know you're sexually compatible with your partner when they don't judge you or shame you for the kinks you have.
Your partner makes you feel sexy and confident
Some couples really struggle because they don't know how to make each other feel sexy and confident. This is an important element any relationship, in and outside of the bedroom. When you're stuck in a loop with a partner who leaves you feeling inadequate, unattractive, and undesirable, it's difficult for you to get in the mood for anything sexual. On the contrary, when you're dating a partner who builds you up and showers you in compliments all the time, letting loose in a sexual sense becomes more of a natural response.
Who wants to strip down and bare all in front of someone who doesn't make you feel absolutely beautiful? A partner who doesn't build your confidence makes sexual moments more awkward and cringe-worthy. A huge sign of sexual compatibility comes into play when you and your partner make it abundantly clear that you find each other attractive. When both people in a relationship feel wanted, the sexual connection thrives.
You enjoy pleasuring your partner, and vice versa
It feels like torture to be in a relationship with a partner who doesn't enjoy pleasuring you. Whenever it's their turn to go down on you, for example, they'll grimace and huff like it's the end of the world. The same feeling comes into play when you're dealing with a partner who ends every sexual experience dead in its tracks after they reached their own personal climax. Why don't they care about getting you there too, so you can share a moment of euphoria together?
This type of issue can certainly go both ways. If you feel like it's an inconvenience and a chore to pleasure your partner in ways that don't physically benefit you, it's obvious the two of you aren't sexually compatible. Both people involved should be excited about the prospect of pleasuring who they're with because they know it will amplify their own experience as well. If one or both of you is missing this point, you're simply not on the right track.
You're equally excited about trying new things
There will always be something new to try, and you'll notice that sex is more enjoyable when you're having it with a partner who's down to experiment with different positions every once in a while. The Kama Sutra alone has around 40 different major positions to explore. That being said, you never have to feel stuck in a box with the handful of positions you're familiar with. Just because you've grown accustomed to missionary, doggy style, and reverse cowgirl, you don't have to stop there for the rest of your life.
As soon as you discover a new position that piques your interest, you should feel comfortable trying it out with the person you're sexually active with. Being with a partner who's open-minded enough to try something new is a big deal. Plenty of people aren't willing to leave their comfort zones, after all. In a sexually compatible relationship, both individuals are typically down to try new things at least once.
You're comfortable with your sexual routine as is
Maybe it's possible that you aren't interested in trying anything new or exploring different bedroom positions. If your partner feels the same, it's a sign that you're sexually compatible. It's fantastic to truthfully acknowledge that you're both perfectly comfortable with your sexual routine. This means the two of you stick to the same few positions whenever you get to it, but neither of you see that as a problem.
You both don't feel threatened by the idea of getting bored because you know that the things you consistently do together always feel amazing. You both know you won't get burned out on your sexual routine because you've learned each other's bodies in ways that makes you feel connected and safe. It feels better to stick to a solid actual routine with your partner instead of trying to spice things up with kinks, position changes, or new people.
You never feel like you have to fake it
The unfortunate truth is that many women can relate when it comes to faking orgasms. Sometimes, faking an orgasm is the easiest way to make unenjoyable sex come to an end without hurting the other person's feelings. Other times, faking an orgasm is the only route to take in order to avoid stirring the pot and creating drama in your relationship. Regardless of what your reason for faking orgasms might be, it's never actually a helpful thing to do.
Faking orgasms convinces your partner they're doing everything right. In reality, they're leaving you unsatisfied without having any knowledge of that fact. As uncomfortable as it might be, it's vital to be honest about orgasms you're having and the pleasure you're experiencing along the way. When you're with a partner you never have to fake it with, the sexual compatibility between the two of you will be undeniable.
You are comfortable giving instructions on how to please you
Tons of talking has to take place between two people if you both really want to enjoy your sexual experiences. In other words, you can't lay there in silence and expect the other person to magically read your mind. It's up to you to open up and provide instructions about what it takes to make you feel good. This is especially important for people who have previous experience in the bedroom and know exactly what's required to have pleasant and memorable sexual encounters.
When you and your partner are comfortable giving each other instructions about what to do in the bedroom, it's a sign of true sexual compatibility. Neither of you is leaving each other hanging or getting silently resentful of the other for a lack of comprehension. The same way you know you'll never be able to read your partner's mind entirely, it's key to respect the fact that they can't read yours. Open conversations are a necessity in this department.
You crave intimacy with your partner more than adult movies or anyone else
In the age of easy virtual access to adult movies and hookup-centered dating apps like Tinder and Bumble, how can you know you have sexual compatibility with your partner? It's quite simple to gauge if you realize you're craving intimacy with your partner more than any adult movies or random hookups you can find on an app.
The reality of adult movies is that you can type exactly what you're turned on by into a search bar and be met with millions of clips that will appeal to you. The reality of hookup-centered dating apps is that you can swipe "right" on as many matches you want and arrange plans to get into their pants within an hour. Knowing you both have easy access to give into any temptations at the drop of a hat, yet still prioritize each other above all else is massive indication of your sexual compatibility.
You don't feel pressure to perform
When you're sexually compatible with your partner, you don't feel pressure to perform in front of them. You might be fully aware of how over-the-top sexual performances look from adult movies you've glimpsed at or TV shows you've watched, but you still aren't feeling pressured to pretend to be something you're not. Instead of faking your moans and faking orgasms in the worst possible case scenarios, you know you can be your truest and most authentic self in the bedroom with your partner.
The same rule applies to the person you're getting intimate with. If they don't feel like they have to go overboard in the bedroom to impress you, they'll be able to let loose and truly enjoy themselves. Those who feel pressure to perform often overcompensate by doing more than what's natural. When this happens, it's difficult for sex to be a freeing or enjoyable experience.
You respect each other's comfort levels
Being able to mutually respect comfort levels with your partner is a top-tier sign that you're sexually compatible with each other. This means you've never experienced your partner pressuring you to get intimate in moments when you simply aren't in the mood. Your partner has never made you feel guilty about wanting to hold off on intimacy for any reason at all.
It also means they respect your comfort levels enough not to continue trying to push your boundaries if they brought a fetish to your attention that you didn't have any interest in trying. There are so many ways you and your partner can prove your respect to each other's comfort levels in order to build a healthier sexual connection and bond. If this is something you've mastered as a couple, you should know that your sexual compatibility isn't necessarily something to be concerned about.
You're both willing to make time for intimacy
Life gets busy! There's no getting around that. Whether you and your partner are swamped with work stuff, school assignments, obligations with kids, or something else, you're both fully aware that responsibilities of life can get pretty hectic. That being said, it's vital to know you and your partner are still willing to make time to share intimacy with each other. Showing intimacy with your partner on a consistent basis is essential to the growth and longevity of your relationship.
If the two of you let way too much time pass by without showing any interest in sex, it can leave one or both of you feeling completely unwanted and undesired. A willingness to make time for intimacy can look many different ways. It might require booking a babysitter for the evening. It might require setting up plans for a romantic weekend getaway. It might even require scheduling a block of time each week you can both set aside specifically to have sex.
You take turns initiating
It's crucial that you and your partner take turns initiating intimate moments in the bedroom. If one person is stuck doing all the initiating, they'll end up feeling like the relationship is majorly imbalanced. It's unfair for one person to always start things up when there are two parties involved. This should be a shared experience that gives both people the chance to feel desired and wanted.
If it's always on your shoulders to pull your partner into the bedroom, you'll probably reach a breaking point where you don't feel like being the initiator by yourself every single time anymore. Your partner will likely end up feeling the same way if they're always having to chase you down and warm you up. An obvious sign of sexual compatibility is two people who subconsciously trade off with the task of initiating. It doesn't have to be completely equal, nor does it have to be this neat little game of tit-for-tat tied up with a perfect bow. All that matters is that both people feel wanted.
You recognize each other's signals and cues
When you and your partner get to an incredible place where the two of you are able to recognize each other's signals and cues, it's a sign that you're sexually compatible. You may easily be able to tell that your partner's in the mood if they keep reaching over to rub your inner thigh with their hand. They might be signaling that they're ready to head to the bedroom if they keep pressing gentle kisses onto your neck and shoulders.
When your partner recognizes specific little things you do to give them the green light, they'll know it's a good time to make a move with you. Often times, couples give each other signals and cues throughout the day. Some of the signals aren't inherently sexual, while others can be overly flirtatious and fun. It doesn't necessarily matter what each of your cues are, as long as you're both able to recognize them when they happen.
You both prioritize quality over quantity
Most people are fully aware that it's necessary to worry about quality over quantity. The same rule applies to sharing intimate moments with your partner. It won't matter if you have sex 10 times in a row, if none of those experiences were pleasant, enjoyable, or orgasmic. On the contrary, if the two of you have sex one time that ends up being beyond explosive and memorable in both of your minds, that should be enough to make you both feel satisfied.
This type of issue mainly rises if you find yourself comparing the rate of your sex life to what other people have going on. As long as you and your partner are willing to focus on each other without worrying about outside factors, this won't end up being a problem. When the two of you can agree to prioritize quality sex over the quantity of how often you're having sex, your sexual compatibility will be in a blissful place.