What Does It Mean To Have A Queerplatonic Life Partner?

Relationships with peers in adulthood are typically placed into two categories, romantic and friendships. Perhaps it seems like there's a societal standard to aim for in which everyone should have a romantic life partner plus a group of supportive friends. However, just like each person on the planet is unique, so are relationships and the ways in which we connect with others. Sometimes, you may just find the life partner you need to thrive in someone with whom you don't share any romantic vibes. In this case, you might have a queerplatonic life partner.

A queerplatonic relationship (QPR) is a term that is often used interchangeably with quasiplatonic relationships, but the gist of what a QPR is comes down to the deep emotional connection shared between two people who don't quite fall into the binary of platonic friendships and romantic relationships (via LiveBold&Bloom). You can think of a queerplatonic relationship as falling into a happy place right in the middle of platonic and romantic connections, but a QPR can also be fluid and the spectrum between platonic and romantic can vary from one set of QPR partners to another. It's possible that queerplatonic relationships stem from the needs of people who identify as aromantic, meaning that they aren't necessarily romantically attracted to others, but who still connect very intensely with another person whose companionship is reciprocal. Not everyone who is in a QPR is aromantic, though. Anyone can be in a queerplatonic relationship.

The experience of being in a QPR and having a queerplatonic life partner (QLP) can feel similar to meeting your soulmate, per LiveBold&Bloom. You connect with someone and you just click and it feels like they've known you your entire life, yet you don't feel romantically attracted to them. If this has ever happened to you, then you've probably met a potential queerplatonic life partner. Another person whose company you enjoy and with whom you feel deeply connected emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually, but you don't want to be romantic or sexual with them. QPRs can make you feel connected with the other person in a way that feels exciting and exhilarating and brings out the best in both of you. To clarify, queerplatonic relationships can form between two people of any combination of gender or sexual identities. There isn't one definition for who can be in queerplatonic relationships, nor does anyone have to label their relationship as being a QPR.

Queerplatonic relationships fall into the sweet spot between friendship and romantic relationships, and more people may experience a QPR than you may think (via LovePanky). Many times, a queerplatonic life partner may be thought of as your closest friend, a person whose company feels deeper and more magnetic than other friendships. When you have a queerplatonic life partner, it's likely that you feel electrified by their presence and they're the first person you message to make plans when you have a night free.

Signs that you have met a queerplatonic life partner are innumerous because they are vast and truly unique. According to DiveThru, there are endless possibilities for the dynamic that can exist in QPRs. There can even be elements of romance if both people consent, which perhaps highlights the beauty of QPRs in that they can be built in whatever way QLPs choose, and they come without the strings attached by heteronormative societal standards. Essentially, being in a queerplatonic relationship is at its core about spending time with a person who might just be your soulmate and enjoying each other's company however you both choose. One important aspect to note is that there could be guilt over having a queerplatonic life partner because you may feel societal pressure to be in a romantic relationship with someone else, yet you simply want to spend all of your time with your QLP. This is a societal fallacy that you should toss out the window ASAP. The connection you have with your queerplatonic life partner is one that transcends any other relationship you have, though it's also possible to have a queerplatonic relationship alongside other close relationships with loved ones in your life.

Queerplatonic relationships don't have to be monogamous, so you can have multiple queerplatonic life partners either simultaneously or throughout your lifetime (via TAAAP). For extra celebration, Queer Platonic Pride Day is the third Sunday of July.