25 Tips To Move On From Heartbreak After A Breakup
Going through a relationship breakup is one of the most devastating things a person might face throughout the course of their life. So much so, in fact, that some people may avoid ending a bad relationship — even if they know its the right choice — because they fear moving on and facing the grief that can follow (via BetterHelp)
According to Everyday Health, it's important to figure out how to achieve closure after your relationship has run its course so that you can focus your energy on a positive fresh start. If you can accept that the relationship is over, then you're already moving in the right direction. And there are things you can do to take care of yourself and your mental health as you pursue a life beyond your former relationship. Just because you're no longer dating your ex-partner, it doesn't mean that you can't find happiness, prosperity, and genuine joy again. Here are ways to help you move on and up.
Delete pictures and videos of your ex
When you're ready to move on from a relationship, it may be a good idea to delete all the pictures and videos you have of your ex. Per Love Panky, this is a personal decision, but one that can help the healing process and send a message to your friends and family members that the relationship is no longer intact. Deleting pictures with your ex is also a smart thing to do when you are ready to re-enter the dating arena. Your new prospects most likely won't be charmed by the sight of you and your ex cuddled up on your Instagram profile.
In fact, according to Insider, there's absolutely no excuse for keeping your ex in your main profile picture after a breakup. Whether or not you keep pictures with your ex on your profile grid or your highlight reels is up to you, though.
If the idea of deleting pictures feels way too scary or permanent, you can archive them instead (via Love Panky). When you archive photos on a social media platform like Instagram, you can hide them and unhide them from your page whenever you feel like it. This is a great option for people who are unsure how permanent their breakup really is.
Pick up a new hobby
Picking up a new hobby is a brilliant way to move on after a breakup since it will keep you busy. DivorceMag.com explains that all you have to do is get a tad bit creative with your interests when thinking about new activities to focus on. Things like experimental cooking, mural painting, horticulture, and vlogging are some lesser-known hobbies to consider.
Exploring new hobbies is better than turning to self-destructive activities such as casual hookups, isolation, or heavy drinking (via Hobby Sprout). Instead, you might consider learning a new language, enrolling in a dance class, knitting, figuring out how to play a new instrument, joining a yoga class, hiking in nature, or reading new books.
The best thing about hobbies is that you can continue bouncing around and trying different things until you discover what truly resonates with you. If there is something in particular that interested you as a child, it might be something you can turn your time and energy to as an adult.
Find a new show to binge-watch
There's no denying the fact that it's super easy to get lost in the magic of a good TV show. When you're busy watching an interesting TV show, it takes you out of your own reality for a little while. According to Time, some of the best TV shows to watch after a breakup include "Killing Eve," "Jane the Virgin," and "Heart Stopper." Collider, on the other hand, suggests "Dollface" and "Love Life" for post-breakup viewing.
If you're interested in reality television in any capacity, "The Ultimatum: Marry or Move On" is a great Netflix hit to check out. The show focuses on a group of young adults in relationships feeling eager to get married. Unfortunately for them, their partners aren't exactly on the same page when it comes to being ready to tie the knot. The messy dynamics of the show's cast members lead to tons of highs and lows that will keep you incredibly distracted.
Go to a comedy show or watch a comedy special
Laughter is truly the best medicine, which means that you should make sure you're laughing as often as possible after a breakup. Catching a local comedy show can help relieve stress, relaxes your muscles, and potentially reduces blood pressure, among other things (via Health Fitness Revolution).
If you can't make it to an in-person show, there are several comedy specials available for streaming on multiple platforms. PasteMagazine.com suggests checking out "Richard Pryor: Live in Concert," "Bo Burnham: Inside," or "Eddie Murphy: Raw" on Netflix. The outlet also mentions comedy specials starring Chris Rock, Natalie Palamides, and Wanda Sykes.
Write poetry
Writing poetry can be incredibly therapeutic for people who are going through a breakup. It's different than simply journaling your thoughts because poetry tells a story in a very artistic manner. Per Education Destination Malaysia, writing poetry improves language skills, sparks creative thinking, creates self-awareness, and expands world views.
Writing Forward explains that writing poetry can lead to catharsis because you're making something out of nothing. It also causes deep critical thinking. If you choose to write poetry that rhymes, it takes even more effort to figure out how to string together the perfect lines of words that sound good and make sense.
Get a makeover
Going through a breakup might inspire you to give yourself a makeover. Brit + Co says that a post-breakup makeover can work wonders when it comes to helping you move on from your failed relationship. Your desire to look good and feel confident after a split is completely normal and natural.
According to She Blossoms, one of the most common makeover angles to take would be switching things up with your hair. You might decide that you want to chop all of your hair off or get extensions sewn in. Maybe you want to go jet black or platinum blonde? If your hair is naturally curly, you might consider opting for a Brazilian blowout or a perm to straighten it out. If you're not comfortable doing anything to your natural hair, experimenting with a wig or two could be incredibly fun.
Start daily journaling
Journaling daily could be the game-changer you need in your life following your breakup. According to Healthline, journaling helps reduce stress, boosts health and well-being, encourages a safe space from your negative thoughts, provides you with a way to process your emotions, and helps you figure out your next step in life.
Daily journaling makes it easier for you to be an organized and focused individual since you're able to better clarify your thoughts (via Grammarly). Do you regret the way your relationship ended? Do you feel like you still miss the person that you were romantically linked to? Are you having doubts about your ability to meet someone else in the future? Whatever your thoughts might look like, writing them down in a private journal will help you feel better about everything.
Create a gratitude list
Going through a breakup can make you feel like every single thing is going wrong in your life. The reality is that even though breakups suck, they don't mean that your entire life is falling apart. For this reason, it makes sense to write up a gratitude list to remind yourself of all the good things you have going for you in your life. Harvard Health Publishing reveals that giving thanks for the things you have can actually make you feel happier.
One of the ways you can practice gratitude would be by creating a gratitude jar (per Healthline). You can start each morning or end each night by writing down something you're grateful for on a small slip of paper and then tossing it into a jar. In a couple of months, you can start pulling out pieces of paper from the jar to remind you about all of the good things that of happened, despite the fact that you just ended a relationship.
Tackle a home renovation project
Tackling a home renovation project is a great option of something to do following a breakup in order to keep you focused on something productive. Domino says that breakup renovations are the new breakup haircuts. If there's a special project around your apartment or home that's been on your mind for a while, this is the perfect time to shift your focus toward it.
Renovating your home after a breakup can become an emotional cleanse (via Decor Tips). If you're accustomed to seeing light blue paint on the walls of your bedroom and it makes you think about all the times you were cuddling your ex-partner in that room, it might serve you well to repaint the walls in a different color that doesn't remind you of them at all.
Invest in a spa day
Pampering yourself is so important, whether you're going through a breakup or not. Investing in a spa day is one of the best things you can do to make yourself feel loved in the midst of a failed relationship. When you're going through a breakup, you might be dealing with dark circles under your eyes, sallow skin, or possible breakouts (per Botanica Day Spa). There are spa treatments that can help.
According to Spa Finder, enjoying a trip to the spa can help you recalibrate your emotions in a major way. Consider getting your nails done, getting a full body wax, or getting a relaxing massage. Spending the day at a spa is supposed to make you feel joyful and relaxed, which is exactly how most people hope to feel after dealing with something as traumatic as a breakup.
Treat yourself to a shopping spree
Per WiseGeek, a shopping spree is meant to be a carefree or pleasant outing for customers in pursuit of brand-new items to take home. After a breakup is a perfect time to make yourself feel spoiled if you have a little bit of extra money set aside or a few gift cards collecting dust in your wallet.
The most important thing to keep track of during a shopping spree is the amount of money you're spending, according to Film Daily. You don't want to swipe your card so much that you end up regretting your shopping spree altogether. Utilizing coupons, creating a solid plan, making sure you're in the right mood, and potentially inviting a friend or family member to join you can make the experience even better.
Socialize with friends
Socializing with good friends is a great way to heal after a breakup. Per Get The Friends You Want, although making new friends can be a challenge after a breakup, it's still an incredibly important thing to pursue platonic connections. If you don't already have a good set of trustworthy friends in your life, this could be the time to meet some.
You can cross paths with new possible friends by trying things you've never done before, leaving the house more often than usual, enhancing your current hobbies, and utilizing social media (via Mend). Joining community organizations such as nonprofits, religious institutions, or cultural centers will also open up the door to new possible friendships.
Visit family members you don't frequently see
Being in a relationship often means you spend a lot of your free time with your romantic partner. In some cases, the connections you have with your various family members suffer because of this. After going through a breakup, one of the best things you can do for yourself is reach out to family members who you haven't seen in a long time. Family Focus Blog notes that family time helps strengthen bonding, brings on greater happiness, and even leads to more self-confidence.
Going through a breakup can make you feel like you want to isolate yourself throughout your pain, but you shouldn't hide away from your family since they can provide you with some of the most necessary emotional support (per Tribeca Therapy). Family members who have been through similar situations can offer you a listening ear and sound advice.
Rearrange your furniture
If completely renovating your living space or moving somewhere new just isn't possible, you can keep things a little more simple by rearranging your furniture. According to The Chicago Tribune, redecorating your home can be incredibly helpful when it comes to providing a fresh start for yourself after a split. If you learn how to properly rearrange your furniture and re-decorate your living space, you won't have to deal with the expensive cost that comes along with full-on renovations or relocation.
Moving Past Divorce notes that you should think about moving any sentimental items that remind you of your ex-partner into a storage unit, to a donation center, or to the trash. Simply pushing your sofa from one side of the living room to the other can make the biggest difference, causing your living space to give off an entirely new vibe. Changing the color scheme of your window shades or adding a new coffee table can be just as impactful.
Create a vision board
There's something motivational about creating a vision board for yourself and your future. When you make a vision board after a breakup, you are telling yourself that there are still so many new opportunities for you to explore in the future. She Blossoms says that creating a vision board to manifest the dream relationship you want to have can be incredibly powerful. All you have to do is think of your vision board as a treasure map leading you in the right direction.
Loveful Mind says that there's nothing wrong with setting new relationship goals after going through a breakup. Do you want your future partner to take you on tons of romantic dates? Do you hope that they love cuddling in bed just as much as you do? Whatever it is that you're trying to attract should be pasted to your vision board so you can absorb the images on a daily basis and turn your manifestation into your reality.
Start planning your next vacation
Uprooting yourself and going to a new destination where you can experience views, food, music, friendly people, and more could be exactly what's required for you to succeed on your healing journey post-breakup. Select 50 Registry says that planning the perfect vacation starts with choosing a region and narrowing down the time of year that you want to go. If you're interested in going somewhere with beautifully fresh fallen snow, you'll have to do your research to find top-notch lodges and cabins. If you'd prefer to go somewhere a little more tropical, there are tons of incredible places to go to fit that bill as well.
According to Ramsey, budgeting your trip is incredibly important so that you don't end up overspending. Figuring out the best possible flights that fit into your budget is a great place to start. It's also possible that you'll find a more affordable place to stay in an Airbnb instead of a hotel room. Whatever the case might be, planning your next vacation can serve as a great breakup distraction, even if the actual vacation doesn't take place for several months.
Decorate for the next upcoming holiday
If your relationship has come to an end right before the winter holiday season, that shouldn't stop you from decorating your home. If you don't feel like setting up an entire Christmas tree with ornaments, you can deck out your doorways, create a makeshift mantle, hang clementines, or drape ritzy ribbons along your staircase (per Real Simple).
If you don't personally celebrate Christmas, you can still opt for a winter wonderland vibe. Artsy snowflakes can make your living space feel so much more vibrant and enticing. According to House Beautiful, there's no real way to go wrong when it comes to decorating for the holidays. For example, even if your relationship came crumbling down right before St. Patrick's Day, you can still have tons of fun placing decorative items in different shades of green around your home.
Go on hot girl walks or invest in a gym membership
Getting into the best shape of your life tends to become easier to do after a breakup for some reason. Per Nordic Lifting, hitting the gym after a breakup will help you release any pent-up emotions and help you start developing more confidence. If you commit your free time to fitness, you'll be less inclined to lounge around your house moping about the end of your relationship.
If investing in a gym membership simply doesn't work for you, The Washington Post suggests getting into the TikTok hot girl walk craze. While on your walk, you can to think positive thoughts, enjoy some of your favorite music, admire the beauty of the great outdoors, and absorb as much sunshine as possible.
Give yourself permission to take naps
Sometimes what we need is a really good nap to help us feel rejuvenated and recuperated. If you give yourself permission to take naps, you can help speed your healing process along. Central Mass Mom explains that anyone who has a chance to take a nap in the middle of the day should take advantage of it, rather than feeling guilty about it.
Wellnest says giving yourself permission to rest is important so that you can avoid burnout, bitterness, resentment, physical and mental health issues, or worse. When you're going through a breakup, your brain is constantly fluttering around into different negative spaces. It's unfair to force yourself to continue functioning day in and day out as if there's nothing wrong. Allowing yourself to rest can make a huge difference.
Sign up for Meetup.com
Breaking up with a partner can push a lot of people into isolation. Reconnecting with friends and visiting family members is important, but it's also great to put yourself out there with new groups of people if possible. Creating a Meetup account can be the game-changer you're looking for.
The good news about Meetup is that you can find groups of people who are interested in all the same things you're interested in. If you're passionate about creative writing, there will be a group for that. If you love talking about modern technology and the impact it will have on society, you'll undoubtedly find your tribe. And according to Succeed Socially, Meetup gives you the chance to socialize in small or large groups, depending on your comfort levels. Or you can use the platform to grow professionally (via Ventera).
Volunteer at an animal shelter
Volunteering at an animal shelter is a great mood booster for just about anyone, whether you're going through a recent breakup or not. MetLife says that volunteering at pet shelters provides emotional satisfaction since spending time with abandoned and abused animals can be incredibly rewarding. Getting the chance to socialize with animals who deserve gentle treatment can make you feel so much better about what's going on in your own personal reality.
Per The Animal Foundation, when you volunteer with animals you get a warm and fuzzy feeling. Animals who are coming from dire situations need endless compassion and patience. A lot of people don't take time out of their busy schedules to involve themselves with volunteer work. After going through a breakup, taking time to volunteer with animals will benefit them just as much as it benefits you.
Clean out your closet
There are so many benefits that come into play when you decide to clean out your closet. The Madrid explains that cleaning out your closet helps you eliminate any negativity from your life since you're removing old and outdated items that you no longer wear. As you create organization and space in your own closet, you might also be improving someone else's life since it's possible your old clothes will become useful and treasured items to them.
When you clean out your closet, you make room for new pieces that fit your current lifestyle, according to Whistlewood Boutique. It also makes it easier for you to mix and match your belongings since there isn't as much clutter in the way. Getting rid of pieces of clothing that your ex-partner purchased for you, and pieces of clothing that remind you of specific date nights or events you experienced during your past relationship will help you move on.
Create a list of reasons why your ex was the worst
As negative as this might sound, writing up a list of all the reasons why your ex was the worst can help you start moving in the right direction. It's better to get negative thoughts out of your head and onto a piece of paper instead of allowing them to stew inside your mind.
According to Harvard Business Review, creating a list of pros and cons can be useful in many situations, but when looking back on a past relationship, simply hone in on all of the cons. Keeping track of all the messed up things your ex did that made you unhappy will encourage you to feel more grateful now that you get to pursue a future without them.
If creating such a list is likely to be emotionally challenging for you, you can make a list of all of your pros instead (via Thought Catalog).
Schedule a therapy session
Some people believe in the benefits of therapy while other people think that it can be a huge waste of time and money. Regardless of your personal opinions when it comes to therapy, it's definitely something to consider if you're fresh off of a breakup. MyWellBeing notes that since breakups are hard, stressful, and emotionally draining, meeting up with a neutral individual to gain insight, advice, and encouragement can help you along your healing process.
Breakups impact your mental health, which means getting help from a professional therapist is sometimes hugely necessary, according to Health for Life Counseling. If your breakup has you feeling like you are spiraling into a depression, reminding you of your loneliness, or triggering your anxiety, a session with a professional therapist should be on your list as you work through your healing process.
Send yourself flowers
There's nothing wrong with purchasing flowers for yourself while you're going through a breakup as they can spark joy (via Dip Well). If your ex would regularly buy flowers for you, it will feel nice to continue seeing fresh flowers on your countertop. And if your ex-partner never purchased flowers at all, it's a great habit to get into for yourself.
According to Melissa Jane Lee, buying yourself flowers can help cheer you up, calm you down, and brighten up your home. When you're going through a breakup, you have to be as gentle with yourself as possible since you're already in such a fragile state. Fresh-cut flowers in your home might be the mood booster you need. Pink flowers will perk you up, red flowers represent power and strength, and purple flowers are simply pretty to look at. Yellow flowers will remind you of happiness, optimism, and sunshine, and white flowers represent new beginnings and fresh starts.